Last evening, Peggy Fletcher Stack of the Salt Lake Tribune gave subscribers a glimpse at a new, sleeveless garment design for women currently available “in hot climates such as Uganda, Kenya, South Africa, the Philippines and some southern U.S. locations.” Additionally, “there is a light, one-piece ‘shift’ (looks like a slip) option and skirt bottom for women who mostly wear dresses as in Africa.” This is big news for practicing LDS women, and I’m pleased by this change and hope the new styles are offered soon to everyone. I see this as evidence the voices of women who are speaking out are penetrating the Church Office Building.
Of course, the change is bittersweet when I think of the decades I endured infections and rashes, not to mention the daily misery of wearing another long layer of clothing on hot, humid days in Texas. The physical discomfort was nothing compared to the guilt that drove me to wear the temple garment, regardless of weather. I’m of a generation of women who were instructed that the only “proper” way to wear the top was underneath my bra. I did exactly that until I couldn’t. The rashes I endured made it impossible to wear a bra at all. I either complied with the instruction I received in the temple or sat braless at home for days while the rashes healed. During a temple recommend interview, I nervously explained this to my former bishop, concerned I wouldn’t get the sought-after signature. The embarrassment on his face and the speed with which he moved on signaled I shouldn’t bring it up again to male leaders, so I never did again. My garment decisions became my own, which is exactly what they always should’ve been. Mine, without any threat of judgment hanging over my head.
While the change in garment design is welcomed and overdue, what we ought to keep in mind is that this change is a reactionary response by the Church’s leadership. Here’s the reality: LDS women have been increasingly rejecting the idea that LDS men have some unilateral, divine authority to make decisions for us, especially about our bodies and clothing. Fewer of us are wearing the temple garment daily and most of us have rejected the antiquated idea that shoulders are somehow immodest. By changing the garment, church authorities aren’t leading us; they are following us. I hope every LDS woman understands the power we have. We, the women of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, caused this change. Congratulations on a work well done!
Never forget that patriarchal systems cannot survive without the sanction of women. Read that again. Patriarchal systems cannot survive without the sanction of women.
Of course, when male church authorities make a change like this, they expect and receive praise for it. They want us to call it revelatory instead of reactionary, but this we should not do. Deny them that vanity.
Instead, praise the women who have pushed for this. Praise the women who have faced their leaders and their culture and said aloud, “This isn’t working for me.” We are the movers and shakers of this Church. We–the women–are the grassroots. We are the people who are really leading this Church. We are the ones who see what isn’t working. We are the ones who were tasked to raise our children to be faithful members and who’ve carried in our hearts the sting of the blame when they won’t tolerate what they should not be made to. We are the mothers and grandmothers of daughters who need better, the mothers and grandmothers of LGBTQ children, the mothers and grandmothers who won’t tolerate abuses, and we will be the last to endure the folly of myopic, male leaders. We are the new, vocal generations of women who, instead of saying, “Golly gee, thank you” when positive changes are made will say “It’s about damn time.”
So to those with the power to enact decisions, it’s about time you removed the cap sleeve, but (if you haven’t already) you need to finish addressing the problems with the garment for women. It does, after all, have two pieces and the more serious health concerns pertain to other piece.
And to those with the real power in this church–to the women, it’s about time we recognize the magnitude of our power. Tape this to your mirror: patriarchal systems cannot survive without the sanction of women. Keep strong.
~~~
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The example given here about this woman’s rash is inconceivable to me. The Church has made exceptions for individual health issues regarding garments (for women or men) as far back as the 1950’s. Once the Bishop is aware, or that you speak to the church distribution center, there is an entire department that will make specific garments needed for that particular health issue. Both my mother and myself, sadly, have needed to use this service the Church provides.
It’s disappointing that members (of either sex) don’t reach out in these cases and ask for help. The Church DOES and always has accommodated them. This isn’t because of ‘pressure’ from women. Nor is it something it is something new.
What appears to be new is that it’s being offered worldwide and available without individual needs help.
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In her description of the rash situation, it sounds like it had everything to do with being told there was only one “correct” way to wear the garment, and had little to do with a need for modified designs. More importantly, the real problem here was a widely accepted idea that women needed permission from male authority figures to make their own decisions.
If a few people were able to take advantage of a poorly publicized department to make different designs, that’s great for them, but for most of the church it effectively didn’t exist. Before you get dismissive about the new designs not being new, do you know whether this secret department would have been willing to make these new designs? Unless you had such a garment made for you, I don’t think you know that. I’m skeptical they would have been authorized. I consider this to be a new and positive development.
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When I served as a missionary at the Distribution center in my area, we were told to only bring up the possibility of the specialized after all other alternatives had been tried/talked about. Then, you have to make a special call to headquarters, get someone to measure you, and pay extra for the different fabric. It may, in some cases, also need priesthood approval. And, the only options are fabric choices, not design choices. You can’t design your own garments. If you’re in the military, you can send in your military-issued underwear and have them printed with the markings.
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The fact that anyone has to have a Bishop’s approval or that this is the suggested route to resolve something so personal is absurd. Also, many women HAVE reached out for help, as embarrassing and personal as that may be to address issues such as rashes and infections. Suggested solutions have been to wear underwear and bras “under” your garments. Suggested that members are not praying or fulfilling all of God’s commandments in order to be relieved of these ailments.
To semi quote you, “It’s dissapointing that members (of either sex) don’t understand that asking for help leads to different results depending on where you live.”
“It’s dissappointing that members (of either sex) don’t reach out to understand that in the same faith, there are different experiences and that one cannot simply project their experience onto another and make it all right.” It’s the age old adage, “if I didn’t experience it, it’s not possible someone else did.”
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With all due respect, I was taught to obey with exactness and to put my own needs aside for the needs of others, and to comply with all asks made of me by my male priesthood holders and the women who support them. To do otherwise was selfish and required of me a change of heart in order to comply to the will of God. It never occurred to me that I could question the authorities or ask the church for an exception. That option was most certainly never offered to me by anyone. Ever! So, was I obedient? Absolutely. Was I naive? Yes. So, please don’t denigrate those who suffered in silence and are just now learning that self-preservation and self-differentiation are ok. In fact, they’re vital in order to have a healthy mental, physical, social, emotional and spiritual relationship with this church.
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At the very least, now you know better.
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“With all due respect, I was taught to obey with exactness and to put my own needs aside for the needs of others, and to comply with all asks made of me by my male priesthood holders and the women who support them.”
You don’t need to be ‘queried’ about your personal medical issues other than the name of your health issue.
I’m unclear if you taught this by the Church or your parents? With all due respect, I watched my mother suffer with her health issues. She was bold enough to talk to her priest leaders who said absolutely, we will make exceptions for you. My mother was a woman who never once let Coca-Cola pass her lips. She followed the commandments to the letter.
I’m not sure where the communication gap is but now we know better. And we now know that it has NOTHING to do with protesting that CHURCH OFFICE BUILDINGS. These accommodations were always in place for both male and female. All we had to do was ask.
Making inquiries of the Lord is spoken of several times in the Book of Mormon. I don’t know what it is that prevent us from doing it now.
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I think something that’s important to remember as well is that regular garments aren’t cheap, let alone the more custom garments offered by the distribution center. I started the process and when I was told what it would cost, realized it wasn’t affordable for me at the time. In more impoverished countries I imagine the custom garments are out of the question due to cost. The new garments will help so many women, especially the skirt style, to avoid infection. The skirt version was never an option either, my only option when speaking with the distribution center was changing the fabric or elastic on the garments.
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I paid no more for specially made garments then you would pay at any distribution center.
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This “widely accepted idea’ is incorrect.
It isn’t secret. The Church Distribution center is available to everyone. This is where many people purchase their garments. All they had to do was ask. Are our hands painted on now?
I wouldn’t be weighing in if I didn’t own garments that were especially made for me and my own health issues.
You’re skeptical? I’m here to tell you I own garments that were specially made for me, due to health reasons, by this division of the Church Distribution center. I have never worked with such loving and accommodating people. You can choose to believe me or not. My mother, now deceased, also needed and received moderations that were approved because of health conditions.
We claim to think for ourselves and yet we can’t inquire of the very people that are over these policies? I can’t speak to what would paralyze women or men from inquiring. we are a religion of faith. Where there is a will there is a way. There was no need to ever protest against the CHURCH OFFICE BUILDINGS when they have made these kinds of accommodations for at least 60 years.
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All they had to do was ask about some service they didn’t even know existed to even ask about. Ug. Your response is extremely dismissive and lacking empathy.
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There is NO committee let alone being second guessed. No one could have a worse or embarrassing issue than mine. What keeps you from asking for relief is beyond me. A self-imposed mental straight jacket come to mind.
Call the Distribution Center and ask for the department that works with these issues. They are kind and understanding.
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You’re right. I’m frustrated as I see LDS members refusing to ask for for help, or to speak to some kind of humiliated committee, when I know how easy it is. “In my specific case”, they gave me the option not to wear the bottom portion of the garment at all as it was it was disrespectful to the garment itself. ASK. When I am not having a flareup I absolutely wear the full garment.
What I know for certain is it isn’t because anyone has protested the CHURCH OFFICE BUILDINGS or made their loud voices known. This has always been something very sacred and can be done individually for both men and women. It has been in effect since at least the 50s. There’s no need to make up signs and protest against the Church.
Sack cloth and ashes doesn’t go over well with me.
The Lord helps those who help themselves. Seek and ye shall find wasn’t just meant for those in the Book of Mormon. Gird up your loins and ask those in authority. They are generally VERY loving and understanding.
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I am so glad you had a positive experience with this department! I’m glad you found something that works for you. I was fortunate enough to have a couple of meetings with the head of the garment department a few years ago, advocating for changes and explaining some challenges and problems and making some positive suggestions, many of which have just come to pass. I wasn’t protesting at the church office building, but I was constructively playing an activist role and it was a member of the general relief Society presidency who eagerly responded to my efforts setting up the meeting for me. I’m glad that you’re experience was positive, but I want to clarify here, in my meetings with the head of the department and another designer, they said that they don’t try to make it easy for people to have access to the custom garments, and they don’t try to publicize that either because it’s so time-consuming and costly. So they try to keep that information, discreet, even though they want to be available if really necessary, but they also admitted that it’s a very lengthy process and admitted that they did not have an easy process for people to go through because they wanted to make sure it was only the people that absolutely necessarily had to have them done. So sure, ultimately in the end it might be an option, but I’ve heard way too many stories of people that I’ve tried to get them where they were embarrassed and interviewed many times and it was, a frustrating and humiliating experience because it was so hard.
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Well written post. “Of course, when male church authorities make a change like this, they expect and receive praise for it. They want us to call it revelatory instead of reactionary, but this we should not do. Deny them that vanity.”
Many good points. Women have turned their individual power over to others for far too long. Praise the women who are individually working to find their voices and advocate for all.
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“By changing the garment, church authorities aren’t leading us; they are following us. I hope every LDS woman understands the power we have. We, the women of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, caused this change…”
There is NO ‘committee‘. All I had to do was to tell one person in the department what the name of my illness was.
This isn’t about the ‘power’ we have as LDS women. The leaders of the Church, the brethren have made this available to makes and females since the 1950s. It is not about protesting or our loud voices. It is about knowing that our hands and mouths are not painted on and that we could’ve asked for help. It has been our unwillingness to ask for assistance that has helped put men and women members in this self-imposed straight jacket.
This accommodation for those in health distress due to garments has been going on since the 1950s if anyone had been brave enough to ask their leaders.
I know because my mother, now passed away, had special garments made for her because of health conditions back in the 70s. As have I. So while you’re busy pouring Gatorade over yourselves, thinking that you’ve changed the minds of the leaders to receive this adjustment it’s always been accommodated for garments and has been available through the Church Distribution center, not as a secret, but for those who were willing to ask.
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There is absolutely no reason anyone should ever have to ask for special accommodation on this issue, much less disclose even the name of a personal medical condition. That level of intimate knowledge about an individual is beyond the scope of what any ecclesiastical leader should be empowered to adjudicate. A woman’s underwear needs and choices are her business and hers alone. The church should get out of the underwear business completely and permanently.
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!THERE’S NO COMMITTEE!
There’s only one (very sympathetic) person you’d need to give this information to and that is the person in the department who will be hand designing/sewing your individual garment. Even then, it’s so they can get it right for your individual needs. If your unwilling to give them that information, so they can get it right for your needs, then I guess we’ve all turned into to snowflakes.🫤
Maybe you deserve to suffer through what is offered to the majority. As always in life, it’s your choice.
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you are not listening to others say their experience is far different than your own. Aston said she talked to those who make decisions about garments and they told her they purposely discourage people from asking and don’t want average members to know what you as one person happened to know. Instead of chastising others who had very different experiences, you should realize how lucky you were.
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I feel like you miss the point. Why? Why do you have to say anything to a leader about it? If it’s a representation of a covenant between you and god, then that’s it. End of story. Everything else is just the culture getting in the way.
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“Why do you have to say anything to a leader about it?”
🤦🏼♀️ You don’t have to go to your Bishop. There is a division of the Church Distribution department who will literally hand stitch your garments to fit your specific health needs. If you don’t want any kind of help with your specific needs then you have no reason to complain.
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The problem is when given the garment I was told flat out that to be faithful I must wear it under all of my clothes at all times and not to ask questions about it. When I did ask my bishop at one point he told me to pray about it and decide and not to ask him. The freedom a person has with some kind of disability becomes an interesting kind of privilege for a very few women. I felt if I asked, I was being less faithful even though I was enduring daily urinary issues and certainly couldn’t as a small chested woman endure my bra sliding up and over my breasts every time I lifted my arms. I ended up making my own decisions through prayer after realizing my priesthood leader simply didn’t need or want to know. It makes me sad to not wear the garment as I was instructed but I just can’t. Because of religious scrupulosity and also because of love for my God, but it just doesn’t work for my body. If I had known I could get the garment special made, I certainly would have asked for that, but 100% most women don’t know that! I was even told specifically not to modify the garment!
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This is unconscionable. Call the Church Distribution Center and ask for the department that handles special needs for garments. None of this is new. It’s been going on since the 1950s.
I think it’s very unfortunate that your Bishop was uninformed. My Bishop and State President were very informed. I was born and raised in Hawaii and what I know for certain is this is not a secret nor is it new.
It has nothing to do with ‘protesting voices’. It has nothing to do with women’s rights. I know everybody wants to jump on board with this women’s rights clamor. It has been offered since the 1950s long before anyone said anything.
It is always offered for both men and women.
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my friend just sent me your article, I could just give you a big fat kiss! I’ve been mostly off of social media today, but I’ve had several friends send me some reels and posts that I’ve just started browsing last half an hour or so, and I’ve been surprised at how much credit is going to the male leaders of the church for their inspiration on this. Again, women and their efforts is not seen or noticed or simply acknowledged. It would undermine too much. I have worked and pushed and tried so hard the last few years to make positive and effective changes to garments, I’ve talked to hundreds of women about their struggles with garments and thanks to a willing and eager and discreet member of the general rs presidency, she sent me up with a couple of meetings with the head of the garment department. I have been through meetings and interviews and podcasts, pushing for this change, I’m not alone. There are so many women that have been trying in their own ways whether they’re small circles or publicly online who have been actively trying to make change that will better peoples experience with something they’re trying so desperately to make work. When the changes finally happened, it was because women were sharing it on their accounts, because it matters to them. I think it was because of these and the different articles that came out that the church had to publicly acknowledge that. Yes they did have some out there there were different and there’s no way that they’re going to be able to keep it in only those climates. The women are pushing too hard and they’re losing too many women and they’re losing women from wearing garments, they knew they had to make concessions and they knew they had to make modifications. But just in my meeting, that was dismissive and it was the female designer that validated me on the side, saying she’s been trying for years to make changes and didn’t have the authority to do so. Again, women are not being seen or heard in the fundamental grass roots ways that they’ve been trying to make change. Your message is so validating and I hear you and love you!
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Mare leaders should be getting the credit. They have been sympathetic on this issue for decades. as I’ve said before these accommodation needs have been going on since the 1950s where those apparently insufferable ‘men’ in the Church have offered special needs for health reasons regarding the design of the garments.
This has nothing to do with women protesters. It has been offered for both men and women since the 50s. Why we’re throwing some kind of party on behalf of ‘women’ who have been protesting the CHURCH OFFICE BUILDINGS is literally unbelievable!
Look it up. It has always been in the Bishop’s manual
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You’re my hero! Thank YOU!
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I have no desire to be interviewed about details of my medical condition. I know what will work best for me. I don’t need to be second guessed by a committee. I know my solution to the problem of a to let me place the symbols on my already functional clothing. But, that will probably not occur in my lifetime.
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Big kiss to Lisa from me too, and Thank you Afton !! You said everything that I wanted to. When I was RS Pres I passed around a comment sheet asking if anyone had issues or problems with their garments. I was surprised how many rather unfavorable comments that were written when I didn’t ask for names . I sent it to the Garment committee and never received any response. Why should woman’s garments be like a medieval nuns hair shirt . I had chronic yeast infections and UTI’s til I stopped wearing the bottoms. I have not had ONE since then . It was creepy ,when I was young and cute, that some old Stake President,I didnt even know ,was asking me about my private parts ( and was later found out to be having an affair ) My daughters, who are all very active , have watched so many of their church friends decide to leave the church . It has been quite disturbing to them ( and me ). When I see so many comments here that seem so judgmental I can start to understand. Why shouldn’t women be comfortable and wear underwear that looks more normal . The mens garments look just like all men’s underwear. My non member friends have asked me if I have to wear that “ Ugly underwear” underneath all our other clothes ?! So embarrassing. It’s all about the marks anyway. Why shouldn’t we wear comfortable fabrics that breathe or a style that’s more attractive. Half of the comments here make me feel like quitting. I will be taking all this up with my loving , kind and UNDERSTANDING Father in Heaven .
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Thank you for pushing for better for the women in your area! I keep in mind Pres. Hinckley’s remark that there’s no “agitation” for female priesthood during an interview with Larry King (if I recall the interviewer correctly). That’s a a call for agitation and you have done exactly that on this important issue. Keep strong!
Pls notice that the negative comments here are coming from one person. Most people understand that the garments cause health issues for women.
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Greetings Lisa,
I can’t imagine that you consider information about special garment health needs, available since the 50’s and is in the Bishop’s Handbook, would be considered a “negative comment”.
I assume you must be speaking about another poster.
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Lisa, I love everything you write. Thanks for your take on the garment change. Will you explain better this sentence you wrote: Patriarchal systems cannot survive without the sanction of women. My stake president vetoed mothers holding babies during blessings. Are you saying we sanction this patriarchal opinion by complying to his opinion. Instead we could do a family blessing with no church involvement whatsoever. I’d love a more detailed explanation from you on how women are sanctioning patriarchy.
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