This “talk” is a fantasy. I wrote it as a response (albeit imperfect) to Elder Anderson’s “Cherishing Life,” as delivered during his April 2025 General Conference address. I publish it as a means to opening conversation and do not claim all women will see things as I do, nor that I have written all that must be written. With that said, please imagine Elder Andersen standing at the podium and saying:
TO THE SISTERS OF THE CHURCH of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the one thing that the Brethren most want you (and your husbands) to understand today is how much we value you, the daughters of God, and how much we value your life. Each of us sitting in these plush chairs is thinking of you, whether you be in this great hall or in distant places. We appreciate all you have done, are doing, and may still do to bear the children of each new generation and to raise children to love the Lord. We acknowledge that many of you have suffered because those of us who stand here, pronouncing church doctrine from this historic pulpit, have repeatedly emphasized the idea that a woman’s value and her worth comes through child bearing and child rearing. We’ve done this even though we understand that many of our faithful sisters are unable to conceive and do not have the opportunity, including through adoption, to raise children during mortality. Our hearts are with you. We never should have equated a woman’s worth with her ability to conceive, bear children, and/or raise children.
Category: Mormon Feminism
Cartoon “Plural Marriage” Destabilizes Family Life for Children
IF YOU NEED MORE EVIDENCE that polygamy culture is alive and well in the contemporary sphere of the LDS, look no further than your gospel library app, specifically at the new picture story published in the Doctrine and Covenants Stories for Children, titled “Plural Marriage: Faith to Obey a Law from the Lord Even When It’s Hard.” (Find it here.***) It provides a carefully curated cartoon version of early Mormon polygamy, stretching from its beginnings with Joseph Smith to its mythologized ending with Wilford Woodruff’s Manifesto, all in just eight panels. To say much is omitted is an understatement. However, its purpose isn’t to teach history but to use well-washed nuggets of fact to tightly define faith as obedience to God through obedience to priesthood authority. That may be the intent, but it seems destined to undermine the mental health (aka the emotional and spiritual well-being) of the children of devout Latter-day Saints, including those in the most secure of homes, by destabilizing their concept of marital boundaries.
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Reactionary or Revelatory? Thoughts on the New Temple Garment
Last evening, Peggy Fletcher Stack of the Salt Lake Tribune gave subscribers a glimpse at a new, sleeveless garment design for women currently available “in hot climates such as Uganda, Kenya, South Africa, the Philippines and some southern U.S. locations.” Additionally, “there is a light, one-piece ‘shift’ (looks like a slip) option and skirt bottom for women who mostly wear dresses as in Africa.” This is big news for practicing LDS women, and I’m pleased by this change and hope the new styles are offered soon to everyone. I see this as evidence the voices of women who are speaking out are penetrating the Church Office Building.
Of course, the change is bittersweet when I think of the decades I endured infections and rashes, not to mention the daily misery of wearing another long layer of clothing on hot, humid days in Texas. The physical discomfort was nothing compared to the guilt that drove me to wear the temple garment, regardless of weather. I’m of a generation of women who were instructed that the only “proper” way to wear the top was underneath my bra. I did exactly that until I couldn’t. The rashes I endured made it impossible to wear a bra at all. I either complied with the instruction I received in the temple or sat braless at home for days while the rashes healed. During a temple recommend interview, I nervously explained this to my former bishop, concerned I wouldn’t get the sought-after signature. The embarrassment on his face and the speed with which he moved on signaled I shouldn’t bring it up again to male leaders, so I never did again. My garment decisions became my own, which is exactly what they always should’ve been. Mine, without any threat of judgment hanging over my head.
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Dear Sister Larson, This is Why I Stand with the LDS Women who Spoke Out on Instagram
DEAR SISTER LARSON, I want to respond to your recent, public post that pertains to the aftermath of last week’s Relief Society Worldwide Devotional, as well as those who agree with its content. I consider myself an LDS feminist, something I haven’t come to easily or without decades of study and reflection, both of Church doctrine and history. I’m disheartened because I think your words alienate LDS women from one another. There’s been too much of that lately, from both views. Because of the many hats you wear (therapist, chaplain, RS leader), your words bear a unique sway that, I think, deserves to be answered. It’s unfortunate that this answer is coming from a place of my own perceived self-defense, but you were neither generous nor kind to those of us who think differently than you do. As you can see, I will be at least as direct in my tone as you were. What I’ll do is repeat each paragraph you wrote and then respond.
(Note to readers: you can click here to read it straight through.)
Sister Larson, you write:
“So I don’t normally weigh in on stuff like this because honestly I feel like it shifts our focus away from assisting in bringing to pass the immortality and eternal life of man(kind). But I feel like I have an interesting perspective because of all of the hats I wear.”
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LDS Men, No More Passes for Your Wrong-headed Obedience
TODAY I DIRECT MY THOUGHTS primarily towards the men who hold the LDS priesthood because two recent events have garnered my attention, in part for the way each involves decisions made by LDS men. The first is the child sex abuse civil lawsuit against the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which was just dismissed by an Arizona judge, and the second is the sudden ending of a San Francisco Bay Area tradition that had Relief Society (RS) presidents sitting beside bishoprics during Sacrament meetings. The decisions I’d like to focus on are not those made by the men considered to have high authority in the Church (or their attorneys), but the decisions of the local leaders to obey them, even in situations where they know obeying them is not only wrong but could bring harm to others.
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Advocating for the LDS Advocates Within
ASPECTS OF THE LDS TEMPLE experience have, once again, been modified. The endowment ceremony now features prominent images of Jesus and the witness couple is reportedly eliminated. Most interesting to me, however, is the addition of an introductory film that identifies the covenants that supplicants will be asked to make, seemingly to address the lack of informed consent that LDS and former LDS have been advocating for. I’m not sure that learning of these covenants just before the ceremony reduces peer pressure or clarifies much about them, but this shift tells me the men in charge are recognizing that informed consent is something members must be able to make. They’ve been listening, just as they (eventually) listened to women who spoke up about the way the previous endowment script disconnected them from a direct relationship with God. Other changes in the last 50 years include the removal of blood atonement penalties from the endowment and shields in the initiatory. Each of these were aspects of the temple experience that advocates justifiably asked be modified.
Advocacy from within the Church has helped bring many changes in recent history. Protect LDS Children and Ordain Women had members and leaders re-examining policy and perspective. I won’t enumerate the many positive changes each movement helped the Church achieve, but the impact of member advocacy is clearly seen in both movements and brought about celebration from the rank and file.
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If the Restoration Continues, So Must the Apostasy Within the LDS Church
PRES. RUSSELL M. NELSON HAS CHEERFULLY stated, “The Restoration continues!” It’s a hopeful message that I hold to. But if the Restoration continues–if there are vital aspects of truth still to be revealed–then this must mean the Church remains, in part, in a state of apostasy. Mind blown, right?
To be clear, I’m not suggesting the church is in apostasy, as leaders of certain schismatic groups proclaim, but rather that the church must still be operating under the influence of philosophies prevalent during the apostasy. There’s a vast difference. One suggests that the LDS hierarchy has made a doctrinal U-turn, leaving aspects of restorationist theology behind, while the other acknowledges that “we see through a glass, darkly” (1 Cor 13:12).
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To LDS Mothers on Children Leaving the Fold
I’D LIKE TO SPEAK TO THE LDS MOTHERS who are watching young adults leave the LDS Church and are wondering if your own children will leave or if you’re doing enough to keep them in. Maybe you’re wondering what those other parents did wrong that caused their family schism. Maybe your child has already left, as all three of mine have. Maybe you’re blaming yourself. Please know you shouldn’t.
My oldest removed his name from the records of the Church a decade ago and my other two stopped participating before the age of 20. I’ve had plenty of time to reflect on my motherly performance, to weigh what I taught my children against the reality of what the Church is. I taught my kids the good news of Jesus Christ, to love God and their neighbors, to possess a generosity of spirit. I did what you’re doing.
And then I brought them to church. There they were taught the same things I was teaching at home. But they were also taught the opposite. They were taught by example that women aren’t of the same value as men and our voices aren’t as important. They were taught God offers cishet people blessings He denies others. They were taught that love says one thing but does another. I know many of you will throw up walls against what I’ve just said. Those walls won’t make my message any less crucial to hear.
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Ending the Objectification of Exalted Women: Joseph Smith’s Antidote to Literal Offspring Theology
MANY LDS WOMEN WERE DISHEARTENED by the rhetoric heard during the recent Women’s Session of General Conference because they were warned against their personal interest in knowing Heavenly Mother. This post will address that, but it is also different from my usual writing because I will be analyzing and challenging the current theology of eternal procreation. Many will disagree with me, some may be offended, but I’ve decided to finally bring forward a fuller rendition of my thoughts on the hereafter, specifically concerning the exalted female body. To be blunt, LDS women like me deserve a better theology than the one we’ve been allotted. Joseph Smith offers us that.
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Will the LDS Church Ever Be Less Patriarchal?
LAST SUNDAY NIGHT, a cute set of young male missionaries, along with a brother from our ward, visit-bombed us, primarily to meet my non-practicing 20 year old son who escaped the surprise experience mid-way through. Everything about this visit with the missionaries was pleasant and typical, including that moment at the end when it was time to ask someone to voice the closing prayer. The senior companion turned to my husband and began, “Since you’re the head of the househo…”
This was the point at which my junior high school experience in drama finally paid off. Without missing a beat, I shriveled in my chair, groaning, as I performed my best impression of a speech-enabled slug suffering as salt pours over it. Lo and behold, the four men in the room immediately gave me their full–and puzzled–attention.
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Life Outside The Book of Mormon Belt 